L.O.V.E. (Don’t look at me like that read the blog first F/%#r!)
Today My brother gave me a call, he is now in Iraq and i wish the best for him. I can’t even hold a phone and say my brother’s without my parents running to me as if he was held for ransom. Well, metaphorically speaking its mostly true.
Any way today was my last day of work so now i can chill for about 6 days before I head upstate Woo hoo.
On my last day i decided to mingle with my co-workers and i was making them laugh and blush, it was a fun last day then one of the girls ask me a serious question ”Do you have a girlfriend? you got to have one with that sense of humor and quirkyness”. I simply told her no. I’m very picky when comes to relationships, its not a shallow thing its something else.. ill explain…
In middle school I was a fat little kid (BIG SURPRISE,,i know) so i didnt have much self confidence. I was the kid who always wears sweatpants to hide my girth. (Nobody will ever know that in those ballon sized, MC Hammer pants, that there was a round little boy. My self esteem was low..as well as my self confidence. Ok i lied I had no self confidence. I always hang out with my friends (all of them guys) because most girls won’t look at me. as if i didnt exist, and i mean ”most” girls, because this is the part that made me the picky person you see before you.
Most of the girls that wouldn’t talk to me….are too worried about their own image, people who thinks that talking to guys like me would knock them down a few bars in the popularity meter. That right apparently im a deduction (sorry watching the olympics, so it kinda flowed) and out of those girls they are mostly stuck up and sorry to say this, brighter than a wet match.
However there were girls during that time, smart fun girls who would actually talk to me. It could have been as simple as a ”hey joe” or we could have actual chit chat about science or something intellectual at the time. (you have to understand its 6 to 8th grade here). It didn’t matter, at that age I began to realize what kind a person i would like to have in my life (thats right by 8th grade i figured it out and this is without the help of a teacher assistant) Someone who is strong independent and open-minded. Someone who is cultured and doesnt care on what everyone thinks about her when she does something out of the ordinary, something out of the box, a different perspective in life……
……
ok i didn’t think of all that at that age…… all i know back then is that someone that would have talked to someone like me as if i was a person and not a deduction, well then its a start. Its not being shallow at all right. later along the years, my confidence grew as i gotten taller and skinnier, as in my fat distributed evenly…sort of and i started to become more socially active. I made some choices in life but most of them never had the sense of security i needed, I don’t know if thats the right word.
uh…
ok i got it..
the person should make me feel like she’s talking to me as a person. Someone adventurous and takes different paths in life and not follow any one elses. Thats the right one for me.
oh…
and she has got to dance well…if not im kicking her out….
ok im joking hehe….
but seriously….dancing….yes
